Carrying Care

3. Who Pays, Who Benefits: The Case for School Lunch as Infrastructure with Stephanie Noto

MaKenzie Wangsness — Tue, 13 Oct 2026 10:30:00 GMT

Who Pays, Who Benefits: The Case for School Lunch as Infrastructure with Stephanie Noto

Nobody stands at the end of their driveway after a Minnesota snowstorm and asks why they’re paying for the plow. So why do we look at a school lunch tray and see charity?

MaK admits she did. She was the mom packing every lunch from scratch, with strong opinions about whatever was on that tray. Then she got curious and learned the tray is a lesson in independence, a health equity issue, and one of the hardest businesses to run in America, all at once.

MaK talks with Stephanie Noto, a registered dietitian and former national menu developer with nearly two decades in school food, about the “taxpayer handout” debate, the stigma of the separate lunch line, and why cheap, ultra-processed food is often the more expensive choice.

IN THIS EPISODE

Why lunch is part of a child’s education, not a break from it
How universal free meals remove stigma
Why “we can’t afford better food” is usually a waste and inventory problem
Plating, pairing, and presentation tricks that get kids to eat the vegetables
Why school meal programs need to turn a profit, and why the regulations aren’t the real problem

TIMESTAMPS
00:00 The plow, the lunch tray, and why this episode
03:09 Early motherhood and building a business
08:32 From dietetic internship to national menu developer
13:27 The turning point: one district at a time
23:04 Autonomy and what kids learn in the cafeteria
28:23 The “taxpayer handout” framing and universal school meals
36:39 Why the stigma of the separate lunch line matters
39:14 Regulations vs. reality on the serving line
43:09 The cheap-food fallacy
47:12 Getting kids to eat the vegetables
56:14 Checking the box vs. building a great program
1:02:12 The book and how to reach Stephanie

CONNECT WITH STEPHANIE
Noto Nutrition Consulting: notonutrition.com
Email: info@notonutrition.com

RESOURCES
Minnesota Free School Meals: https://education.mn.gov/mde/dse/fns/snp/free/
MDE program data (PDF): https://education.mn.gov/mdeprod/idcplg?IdcService=GET_FILE&dDocName=PROD085180&RevisionSelectionMethod=latestReleased&Rendition=primary

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2. The Next Wave of Care: What Happens When Childcare and Eldercare Collide? with Nicole Hilgenkamp

MaKenzie Wangsness — Tue, 29 Sep 2026 05:30:00 GMT

When MaK's father-in-law had a couple of strokes, she and her husband started asking the hard questions about downsizing and safety. Before they got answers, he passed away unexpectedly — and the family ended up sorting through a sea of paper that included electric bills from 1978. He had a will. Nothing else. The family couldn't touch his accounts, and his funeral ended up on a credit card.

Nicole Hilgenkamp's story started from the other direction. Her mom didn't die suddenly — she landed in the hospital, and that's when the paperwork crisis started. With no plan, Nicole picked a rehab facility off online reviews. Her mom ended up moving three times.

Nicole spent 30 years in corporate change management. None of it prepared her for this. Now she's the founder of Your Parents Keeper, helping adult children plan for elder care before the emergency forces the education.

In this episode, MaK and Nicole cover the documents most families don't have ready, the difference between being "observed" vs. "admitted" at the hospital (which can cost thousands of dollars), why a will only covers what happens aftersomeone dies, and what employers can do this quarter to support caregiving employees — beyond FMLA and a list of facilities in your zip code.

In this episode

Nicole's story: her father's sudden death, her mother's 11-year refusal to plan, and the dementia diagnosis that changed everything
Why corporate skills don't transfer to navigating healthcare, legal, and family dynamics at once
The "silver tsunami": why 1 in 4 Americans are caregiving right now, and why employers still don't have a plan
Why people hide caregiving from managers — and what it costs companies in retention
The sandwich generation's double load: caregiving for parents while still parenting your own kids
Home safety red flags families miss (Nicole didn't know her mom hadn't bathed in 10 years)
Why you need a Plan A, B, and C for care facilities — not just a Plan A
Documents families need beyond a will: financial POA, healthcare directives, HIPAA authorization, Medicare authorization, funeral directive, and more
Why a beneficiary designation overrides your will
"Observed" vs. "admitted": the hospital status that can cost $10,000+ out of pocket
Building a "go file" so medical info doesn't have to be re-explained at every hospital and facility
Nicole's biggest regret: time lost to logistics she could've spent with her mom and her own daughter
Concrete steps employers can take this quarter — beyond FMLA

Guest

Nicole Hilgenkamp, founder of Your Parents Keeper and elder care strategist. After 30 years in corporate change management, Nicole became the designated caregiver for her own parents and now helps adult children plan, manage, and survive caring for aging parents.

Website: yourparentskeeper.com
Instagram & Substack: @yourparentskeeper

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Follow along on Instagram and leave a rating wherever you listen — it helps other working families find the show.

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The Carrying Care Podcast: The Voice of Working Families

What is Ambiguous Grief & Connection-Based Parenting? with Kelly Tronstad

MaKenzie Wangsness — Tue, 15 Sep 2026 17:29:01 GMT

In this episode, MaK Wangsness interviews Kelly Tronstad, executive director of Bellis, about supporting parents, understanding temperament, and navigating the systemic challenges in child welfare. Kelly shares her journey from parenting educator to advocate for disenfranchised parents and discusses how compassion and connection can transform parent-child relationships.

Resources:

Guest links:

The Story Behind Carrying Care

MaKenzie Wangsness — Tue, 15 Sep 2026 16:20:52 GMT

You are not failing at family life—the system is failing you. MaK Wangsness, a marketer and mom who has lived through food insecurity, financial aid, and parenthood with zero paid leave, launches Carrying Care with a clear mission: expose what caregiving in America really costs and why so many families are left holding everything together alone.Drawing on six years leading a workplace community for parents and caregivers, MaK has heard hundreds of stories from new parents, school-age parents, people caring for aging relatives, and families supporting kids with special needs. That experience shapes a podcast and community built to examine the policies, workplace norms, and benefit structures that affect daily life—and to center the real families living inside those decisions.You’ll hear why the mental math of PTO, daycare pickup, doctor appointments, and deadlines is not a personal failure, but a design problem. MaK makes the case that caregiving stress is not about doing it wrong—it’s about operating inside systems that were never built for the people doing the caring.You’ll discover:

Why paid leave, childcare, and workplace culture are inseparable from family well-being
How support systems can either stabilize working families or quietly break them
What MaK learned from years of listening to caregivers across every stage of family life
Why the conversation has to move from individual guilt to structural change

This podcast is for parents, caregivers -- anyone who has ever felt like they’re barely keeping up without a village -- and the people who are building and creating those villages. It’s also for listeners who want to understand the bigger picture behind family policy and what it actually takes to build a world that supports caregiving instead of punishing it. Carrying Care launches September 15th. If you care about families, workplace reality, and the systems shaping both, this is the episode to start with.

Trailer: What Keeps You Up at Night?

MaKenzie Wangsness — Tue, 15 Sep 2026 16:09:59 GMT

You are not falling behind. You are not doing it wrong. You are just trying to hold it all together in a system that wasn’t designed for you.

If you’ve ever found yourself lying awake at night doing impossible math—balancing PTO, daycare pickups, camp registrations, doctor appointments, work deadlines, and taking meetings from the school pickup line —you know the feeling of the "care gap" that exists in the United States. But here is the truth nobody tells you: this isn’t a "you" problem. It’s a systems problem.

⁠Carrying Care⁠ is a podcast for anyone holding it together without a village, and for anyone ready to help build one. Hosted by ⁠MaK Wangsness⁠, who has navigated these gaps from childhood to parenthood, this show digs into the policies shaping caregiving in America—leave, childcare, and workplace culture—and shares real stories of families living inside their impact.
Whether you’re a parent, a caregiver for aging family members, or simply trying to navigate life in a system that often fails us, this spa