In this episode of Shadow Playground, Ez Bridgman sits down with author and anti ageism activist Ashton Applewhite to explore the stories we've been told about getting older and what becomes possible when we begin questioning them.

Ashton shares how her assumptions about ageing changed when she began researching longevity and speaking with older people. Instead of the inevitable decline she expected, she discovered a far more complex and diverse picture of later life.

Together, Ez and Ashton explore ageism: the stereotypes and discrimination we attach to people based on how old we think they are. They discuss why ageism affects both older and younger people and why the longer we live, the more different from one another we become. Ashton and Ez

They examine the cultural forces that make ageing something to resist. From beauty standards and anti ageing products to industries built around fears of physical decline, Ashton asks us to consider who benefits when natural parts of ageing are turned into problems that need fixing.

The conversation also explores chrononormativity, the idea that life should follow a socially approved timeline. Get married. Have children. Build a career. Save for retirement. Look a certain way by a certain age.

What happens when we stop treating those expectations as rules?

Ez and Ashton discuss the freedom that can come from caring less about other people's expectations and allowing ourselves to design lives that don't follow a predetermined timeline.

They also explore the relationship between ageism and ableism and our tendency to fear our future older selves. Ashton introduces the idea of becoming an “old person in training”, developing curiosity and empathy toward the person we may become rather than distancing ourselves from them. Ashton and Ez

The conversation turns toward intergenerational connection and why making friends across age groups can challenge assumptions, broaden our perspectives and make our lives richer.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• What ageism actually means
• Why ageism affects olders and youngers
• How anti ageing industries profit from fear
• Why ageing can bring confidence and freedom
• What chrononormativity tells us we “should” achieve
• The connection between ageism and ableism
• Why we fear our future older selves
• Becoming an “old person in training”
• Why intergenerational friendships matter
• How age segregation limits us
• Why there is no right way to age
• The value of being rather than constantly doing

Ashton offers a different way of imagining ageing: not as a problem to solve or a decline to outrun, but as another part of being human.

Perhaps preparing for later life doesn't mean trying to stay young. Perhaps it means becoming curious about who we are becoming.

ABOUT ASHTON APPLEWHITE

Ashton Applewhite is an author and activist challenging ageism and the way we think about ageing. She is the author of This Chair Rocks: A Manifesto Against Ageism and co founder of Old School. Ashton and Ez

This Chair Rocks
Old School

V10 Life Design

Interested in designing an enlivening life, with space for both joy and shadow? Visit V10 Life Design to learn more.

Why do humans sometimes laugh at things that don't seem funny at all?

In this episode of Shadow Playground, Ez Bridgman sits down with humor researcher Dr. Caleb Warren to explore the psychology of dark humor and why something can feel wrong and funny at exactly the same time.

Caleb introduces the idea of the “benign violation”: something becomes funny when we perceive it as a violation of a norm while simultaneously experiencing it as safe, acceptable or harmless. A joke about death might work because we know it isn't real. A socially inappropriate moment can become funny once we realize nobody was actually harmed.

But that balance is highly subjective.

What feels harmless to one person may feel deeply offensive to another. Our culture, experiences, relationships, values and distance from an event all influence where we draw the line between funny and simply wrong.

Ez and Caleb explore the idea of psychological distance and why “too soon” really can be too soon. Time, physical distance, social distance and whether something is real or fictional can change our ability to laugh at difficult subjects. Magic-episode-01

They also discuss humor as a way of coping and communicating. Sometimes laughter tells the people around us that although something went wrong, we're okay. Dark humor can also help us engage with uncomfortable realities without becoming completely overwhelmed by them.

The conversation moves into satire, roasting, practical jokes, workplace humor and the risks of trying to be funny in front of diverse audiences. Humor can challenge norms and expose absurdities, but it can also reinforce inequalities, humiliate people or become a tool for bullying. Magic-episode-01

And what do tickling, peekaboo and dark comedy have in common? Caleb explains how even some of our earliest experiences of laughter involve playing with the boundary between threat and safety.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• Why dark and taboo subjects can make us laugh
• The psychology of the “benign violation”
• Why the same joke can be hilarious to one person and offensive to another
• How psychological distance changes what's funny
• Why some jokes are simply “too soon”
• How humor can help us cope with difficult experiences
• Why trying to be funny at work can be risky
• The difference between being funny and being cool
• How satire can challenge social norms and power
• Why roasts work — and why they sometimes go horribly wrong
• What tickling and peekaboo reveal about laughter
• How humor can reinforce social inequalities
• When dark humor helps and when it causes harm

Rather than giving us a simple formula for what's funny, this conversation reveals just how dependent humor is on context.

Perhaps the question isn't simply, “Is this funny?”

It's: funny to whom, in what context, from what distance — and at whose expense?

ABOUT DR. CALEB WARREN

Dr. Caleb Warren is a researcher whose work explores the psychology of humor, coolness and how people interpret violations of social norms. His research includes the benign violation theory of humor and the psychology of what makes people, products and ideas seem cool.

V10 LIFE DESIGN

Interested in designing an enlivening life, with space for both joy and shadow? Visit V10 Life Design to learn more.

But when can healthy intentions become harmful?

In this episode of Shadow Playground, Ez Bridgman sits down with body image researcher and psychologist Dr. Charlotte Markey to explore eating disorders, disordered eating and our complicated relationships with food and our bodies.

Charlotte explains how our relationship with food changes throughout life. Babies largely respond to hunger and fullness, but as we grow, schedules, social expectations, appearance pressures and countless rules about what we “should” and “shouldn't” eat begin influencing our choices.

Together, Ez and Charlotte explore what a healthy relationship with food might actually look like: eating regularly, enjoying a variety of foods, responding to our bodies and maintaining flexibility rather than following rigid rules.

They unpack the difference between disordered eating and eating disorders, and why eating disorders don't have one particular look. They can affect people across ages, genders and backgrounds, with behaviors ranging from restriction and dieting to excessive exercise and concerns around muscularity. Dr. & Ez

The conversation also explores how seemingly “healthy” behaviors can gradually become harmful. Going to the gym can become compulsive exercise. Cutting out one food can become eliminating more and more foods. What begins as an attempt to improve health or appearance can eventually consume significant mental space and interfere with living a full life.

Charlotte discusses the many factors that can contribute to eating disorders, including genetics, personality, family socialization, cultural beauty standards and the desire for acceptance and belonging.

They also examine the changing conversation around body size and weight-loss medications, including the tension between their legitimate medical uses and cultural pressure to treat certain bodies as problems that need fixing.

Finally, Charlotte discusses recovery, why professional support is often essential, and how friends, parents and educators can respond when they're concerned about someone's relationship with food.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• What a healthy and flexible relationship with food can look like
• The difference between disordered eating and eating disorders
• When “healthy” habits can become harmful
• Why eating disorders can affect anyone
• How genetics, personality and socialization influence risk
• How cultural beauty standards shape our relationship with food
• Weight-loss medications and changing attitudes toward body size
• Why nourishment matters for physical and mental health
• What eating disorder recovery can involve
• How to support someone you're concerned about
• How parents can encourage healthier relationships with food and bodies
• Why education and media literacy matter

Rather than giving us another set of rules about what we should or shouldn't eat, this conversation returns to one central idea: flexibility.

Can we listen to our bodies, question the messages surrounding us and create relationships with food that leave space for a full and meaningful life?

ABOUT DR. CHARLOTTE MARKEY

Dr. Charlotte Markey is a psychologist, body image researcher and author who leads the Healthy Development Lab. Her work explores body image, eating and health across different stages of life.

V10 LIFE DESIGN

Interested in designing an enlivening life, with space for both joy and shadow? Visit V10 Life Design to learn more.

We hide it, judge it, suppress it or expect our partners to make it disappear.

But what if jealousy has something to tell us?

In this episode of Shadow Playground, Ez Bridgman sits down with relationship researcher and depth psychologist Dr. Joli Hamilton to explore jealousy, compersion and the shadowy emotional territory that relationships can bring to the surface.

Joli explains why jealousy isn't simply a “negative” emotion to overcome. It can point toward attachment wounds, unmet needs, perceived threats, desires and parts of ourselves that we haven't yet fully understood.

Together, Ez and Joli explore jealousy through the lens of Jungian psychology and individuation, the lifelong process of becoming more aware of the complexity within ourselves. They discuss why taking responsibility for our unconscious patterns matters and how relationships can become powerful spaces for self-discovery.

They also unpack the difference between jealousy and envy. Jealousy involves a triangle: ourselves, someone we value and a real or imagined interrupter. Envy involves comparison, wanting something another person has or represents. When the two collide, relationships can become emotionally overwhelming. Magic-episode-01

The conversation explores jealousy in both monogamous and non-monogamous relationships, including what these different relationship structures might teach us about communication, agreements, boundaries and emotional responsibility.

Joli also offers a practical roadmap for working with jealousy: noticing how it appears in the body, naming it without shame, becoming curious about the story underneath it, and only then deciding what needs to be communicated or negotiated with a partner.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• Why jealousy can become obsessive and overwhelming
• What erotic jealousy is and why jealousy can sometimes increase desire
• Why suppressing jealousy doesn't necessarily make it disappear
• The difference between jealousy and envy
• How attachment, threat and comparison can shape jealousy
• What Jungian shadow work can teach us about relationships
• Why unconscious patterns still require responsibility
• What individuation means within a relationship
• Jealousy in monogamous and non-monogamous relationships
• A practical roadmap for working with jealousy
• Why immediately asking a partner to change can miss what's underneath
• What compersion means and why it shouldn't be forced
• The shadow side of performative compersion
• How boundaries and differentiation can support deeper relationships

Rather than trying to eliminate jealousy, Joli invites us to become curious about it.

What is this feeling protecting? What story are we telling ourselves? What does it reveal about our needs, fears, desires and relationships?

Jealousy may be uncomfortable, but learning to meet it consciously can turn it into an opportunity for deeper self-understanding.

ABOUT DR. JOLI HAMILTON

Dr. Joli Hamilton is a relationship researcher and depth psychologist whose work explores jealousy, individuation, non-monogamy and relationships. She hosts the Playing With Fire podcast and works with individuals and groups through programs including Year of Opening and Individuation Alchemy.

V10 LIFE DESIGN

Interested in designing an enlivening life, with space for both joy and shadow? Visit V10 Life Design to learn more.

Thin. Strong. Smooth. Young. Controlled.

But what if our bodies were never the problem?

In this episode of Shadow Playground, Ez Bridgman sits down with author, body image advocate and Body Happy Org founder Molly Forbes to explore body shame, body respect and how the cultures surrounding us shape the way we experience our bodies.

Molly shares what she has learned from working with children, young people and schools. Poor body image can affect far more than appearance, influencing whether a child feels comfortable raising their hand in class, participating in sport, spending time with friends or even going to school.

Together, Ez and Molly explore the invisible ecosystem of messages we absorb about bodies, from family conversations and school environments to cartoons, gender stereotypes, advertising, social media and increasingly AI-generated images.

They discuss how ordinary human experiences such as body hair, sweat, ageing, changing bodies and bodily functions can become sources of shame, and how consumer culture can turn normal parts of being human into “problems” that need fixing.

Molly also introduces a different possibility: body happiness.

Rather than making appearance the centre of how we value ourselves, what if we experienced our bodies as the way we move through and experience the world?

The conversation also explores practical ways to interrupt body-shaming messages through curiosity, boundaries and conversations that encourage young people to question the assumptions they have absorbed.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• How body image struggles can show up in children and teenagers
• Why body shame is bigger than social media
• How schools, families and culture influence body image
• Why children can absorb anti-fat bias from a young age
• How gender stereotypes shape ideas about “good” bodies
• The relationship between consumer culture and body shame
• What AI-generated “perfect” bodies could mean for us
• Why appearance doesn't have to be the most important thing about us
• What “body happy” actually means
• How curiosity can interrupt body-shaming language
• Why commenting on changes in someone’s body can be complicated
• How social media can sometimes support positive body image

Body respect isn't only about how we feel about ourselves. It's also about how we speak about, treat and make space for other people's bodies, particularly bodies that look or function differently from our own.

Perhaps part of designing a more enlivening life is remembering that our bodies aren't static objects to perfect. They're living, breathing and changing parts of the human experience.

ABOUT MOLLY FORBES

Molly Forbes is an author, body image advocate and founder of Body Happy Org, a nonprofit working to create environments where children and young people can celebrate, respect and accept all bodies, especially their own.

She is the author of Body Happy Kids and Every Body.

V10 LIFE DESIGN

Interested in designing an enlivening life, with space for both joy and shadow? Visit V10 Life Design to learn more.

But what about tension?

In this episode of Shadow Playground, Ez Bridgman sits down with relationship scientist, marriage and family therapist, and sex therapist Marisa Cohen to explore the role tension plays in our relationships from the butterflies and obsession of new attraction to the differences, conflicts and desires that emerge over time.

Marisa explains what happens during limerence, when we can become intensely focused on another person and begin viewing both them and the relationship through rose-tinted glasses. They explore why this initial spark can sometimes cause us to explain away red flags, and why long-term couples may find themselves chasing the intensity they experienced at the beginning.

Together, Ez and Marisa explore what happens when someone seems perfect “on paper” but there is no spark, why compatibility can’t be reduced to a checklist, and how relationships can become spaces for learning, growth and discovering more about ourselves.

They also look at the tension between the “I” and the “us”: why maintaining individual interests and experiences can actually bring new energy into a relationship, and how differences between partners can become strengths rather than problems.

The conversation moves into the more difficult forms of tension too conflict, anger, transgressions, unhealthy patterns and the point at which tension stops serving a relationship. Marisa shares how she helps couples slow down, hear one another and distinguish productive discomfort from dynamics that require firmer boundaries or attention to safety.

And, naturally, they explore play from trying something new together to conversations about sexuality, desire and what play actually means for each couple.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• What limerence and “new relationship energy” can do to our perception
• Why an initial spark doesn't necessarily predict a successful relationship
• How attraction can sometimes lead us to explain away red flags
• What to do when someone seems perfect on paper but there’s no chemistry
• Why there is no magic number of dates for deciding whether something could grow
• How differences between partners can strengthen a relationship
• Why maintaining an individual life can bring energy back into the “us”
• How play, novelty and discovery can help couples reconnect
• What happens when healthy tension turns into destructive conflict
• The emotions that may exist underneath anger
• How couples can navigate different needs, boundaries and desires
• Why enthusiastic and ongoing consent matters when exploring play
• How to know whether tension is serving your relationship or breaking it down

What feels like playful bickering to one couple may feel like disrespect to another. Rather than comparing our relationships to other couples or to the relationships we see online, Marisa invites us to get curious about what is actually happening between us.

Is this tension bringing us closer, helping us grow and keeping something alive?

Or is it pulling us apart?

ABOUT MARISA COHEN

Marisa Cohen is a relationship scientist, marriage and family therapist, sex therapist, and attachment-based researcher. Her work explores relationships, compatibility and the dynamics that help couples strengthen their connection, navigate change and better understand one another.

You can learn more about Marisa and her work through Embracing Change Marriage and Family Therapy and her personal research website.

V10 LIFE DESIGN

Interested in designing an enlivening life, with space for both joy and shadow? Visit V10 Life Design to learn more.

But what is it actually doing to our brains?

In this episode of Shadow Playground, Ez Bridgman sits down with neuroscientist and author Dr. Dean Burnett to explore our increasingly complicated relationship with screens, social media, smartphones and AI.

Rather than treating technology as entirely good or bad, Dean brings a more nuanced perspective to the conversation. He explores why our brains find screens so compelling, how social media can provide genuine connection and creativity, and why the same technology can also pull us into doomscrolling, comparison and endless feeds.

Ez and Dean unpack what happens when you open an app for a few minutes and emerge 45 minutes later, why the brain prefers immediate rewards and dislikes unfinished experiences, and how social media can make it unusually easy to enter a state of cognitive flow.

They also explore one of the most emotionally charged questions surrounding technology: children and screens. Dean discusses the differences between digital natives and digital immigrants, why parents and teenagers may perceive technology so differently, and why the quality of the parent-child relationship may matter more than imposing simplistic rules around screen time.

The conversation then turns toward AI, online echo chambers and the ways our brains can become vulnerable to information that confirms what we already want to believe.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• Why our brains find screens and digital experiences so compelling
• The benefits technology can provide for connection, creativity and community
• What happens in the brain when we lose ourselves in an endless social media feed
• Why doomscrolling can be so difficult to stop
• The difference between having an online community and having an audience
• How social comparison can affect our experience of social media
• What parents may misunderstand about children and smartphones
• Why teenagers and parents often perceive digital risks differently
• Practical ways to create more intentional boundaries around technology
• How confirmation bias can pull us deeper into online rabbit holes
• Why AI chatbots can feel surprisingly human to our brains
• What a healthier future relationship with technology might look like

Rather than asking whether technology is simply good or bad, this conversation invites us to consider a more useful question:

How do we want technology to fit into the lives we are designing?

ABOUT DR. DEAN BURNETT

Dr. Dean Burnett is a neuroscientist, author and science communicator whose work explores the human brain and the ways it shapes our everyday experiences. His work includes examining how modern technology interacts with our brains and why debates around screens, smartphones and young people require more nuance than they often receive.

V10 LIFE DESIGN

Interested in designing an enlivening life, with space for both joy and shadow? Visit V10 Life Design to learn more.

Gossip has a bad reputation. We associate it with judgment, rumors, betrayal and talking behind someone’s back.

But what if gossip is actually a fundamental part of being human?

In this episode of Shadow Playground, Ez Bridgman sits down with social psychologist and gossip researcher Frank McAndrew to explore why humans are so fascinated by other people’s lives, and why our instinct to gossip may have played an important role in our survival.

Frank shares an evolutionary perspective on gossip, explaining how our ancestors relied on social information to understand who could be trusted, who might pose a threat and how to navigate the unwritten rules of their communities.

Together, Ez and Frank explore the difference between good gossip and bad gossip, why sharing information can create intimacy and trust, how gossip helps groups enforce social norms, and why knowing that others may talk about us can actually influence us to behave differently.

They also discuss our fascination with celebrity gossip, schadenfreude, social competition, gossip in the age of social media, and the point at which talking about someone should become talking to them.

In this episode, they explore:

• Why gossip may be an evolutionary social skill
• The difference between good gossip and harmful gossip
• Why gossip can create connection and trust
• How gossip helps groups establish and enforce social norms
• Why we sometimes enjoy hearing about another person’s downfall
• Why celebrity gossip is so compelling
• How social media has amplified ancient gossip instincts
• The difference between a “gossipphile” and a “gossiphobe”
• When gossip should turn into a direct conversation
• How becoming more conscious of gossip can change the way we share information

Rather than asking whether we should gossip at all, this conversation invites a different question:

How can we become more conscious of why, when and how we gossip?

About Frank McAndrew

Frank McAndrew is a social psychologist whose research explores gossip, evolutionary psychology and human social behavior. He has spent decades studying why we care so deeply about what other people are doing and the role social information plays in relationships, communities and group life.

Discover V10 Life Design

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Korra AnarchKey (she/they) is here to share the spirit of alternative culture and youthful rebellion! Whether it's being a rock'n'roll princess or an abstract entity, she is here to show you a different side to human reality. Are you ready for the rise of AnarchKey?

Socials: @korraanarchkey 

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES: 

• Imagine you have an on/off switch that allows you to empathize with anyone. 
• Find a way to artistically express a part of yourself that feels dark or taboo. 
• Visualize a shadow aspect of yourself and converse with it. 
• To catapult from a negative state of mind to a positive one, first fully feel your feelings in the moment. Then, express what you are feeling in a creative and cathartic burst, bringing yourself to neutral. Then keep an open mindset and continue along the seem trajectory. 
• Practice self-care by cleaning your space, washing yourself, and picking out nice clothes then showing the world what you want to wear. 
• When you express dark aspects of yourself, you can do so in ways that are loving, out of love, to protect someone you love, or because it might help them learn something. 

IDEAS: 

• Drag is a ceremonial and performative shamanic practice that allows for a deep exploration of autonomy. 
• You can use drag to share dark or taboo aspects of oneself, such as mental health struggles or feelings of oppression. This bloodletting is a means of achieving catharsis.
• Others can also experience catharsis through witnessing your art. 
• When something is in the shadows it holds great potential as it isn’t yet defined. 
• When we share our shadow, we integrate these aspects into ourselves and they can become positive. 
• All energy and emotions are useful, you just need to learn to channel them. 
• Even if you are experiencing a lot of bad energy, it can still help you understand what you like, what you don’t like, and how you can navigate that energy in the future. 
• Whatever negative emotions you are feeling, you can feel the inverse to the same degree. 
• Ground yourself into your physical reality when you are feeling negative thought patterns. Then analyze what is going on in your head. 
• Everything occurs in cycles & waves. 
• Everyone contains aspects of masculine and feminine energy. Masculine energy can be understood as an outward, initiating energy, and feminine energy as inward, holding, cycling and renewing. 
• By changing how others see you, you can change the way you see yourself. This said, don’t let others define who you are. 
• Creating a stronger community by embracing differences and commonalities.
• Spirituality should be enjoyable. 
• There is no one true spirituality or religion, and individuals should find what resonates with them.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

-GUEST BIOGRAPHY-

It is with her radiant joy and contagious enthusiasm that Juanita accompanies beings to connect with their own powerful inner confidence, to realize their true nature and manifest their dearest aspirations. With her unconditional love for life, passages and transformation, she guides those that seek through the process of liberation.

Her work is supported by deep workshops and rituals based on the traditional and timeless teachings she received from Tibetan Buddhism, Yogic traditions and Indigenous and Shamanic lineages. Her unique, effective and authentic approach offers everyone a unique chance to transcend the futile towards a life of expansion and sublime ecstasy.

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES 

• Create an event using principles of theater, ceremony and storytelling. 
• Connect to a part of yourself or an emotion and express it through your body. Allow the energy to just pass through and stay in movement. 
• Surround yourself with people and allies to hold the space for your changing, growing and expanding love. 
• Explore tools to be in dialogue together: non-violent communication, social permaculture, conscious communication, forum Zegg.

IDEAS

Aligning with the voice of the heart 

• When we are born, we are all glowing and that glow and vital energy continues to always be there.
• There are many ways to find the voice of the heart. It's about shedding layers until we find what is true for us. This process is fun, and can also involve going through a lot of darkness.
• This voice refers to whatever is actually there. For instance, if you have to make a choice but you are unsure, you can simply own that you are unsure.  
• In your transformation process, allow yourself to remain curious as the alignment becomes more and more subtle. Furthermore, it's not an end point - you can simply embrace the journey, keeping a commitment to keep moving towards the emergent truth. 
• Focusing on walking our path and being in our alignment creates a natural joy that ripples out. The more love you have for yourself and your community, the easier it is to spread the love. 
• All places are divine, and we connect with magic when we are all in our own divine place. Ordinary moments just glow. 
• We also need to be able to allow for the death of beliefs & constructs. By shedding, we die and are reborn each day. Each day there is more space and we are more luminous. 

Conflict  

• Conflict is a mirror for ourselves, and it always allows us to grow. 
• We need to learn to take responsibility (what can you own), name how we are feeling, forgive, see ourselves, and listen with our hearts. If you have owned everything and something else isn't owning their side, you can respectfully just move away. Connect to your 'no' - it is power. 
• Try to see the person as they are versus how you think they should be. 
• Balance your love with boundaries, and remember that to give love we need to love ourselves.  
• We can keep walking with love, truth, discovery and curiosity, accepting the rough conflict mirrors that help us polish and grow. This is the divine and sacred play.

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-GUEST BIOGRAPHY-

Rehana Tejpar is a facilitator, mediator and coach working with leaders and organizational ecosystems to support culture change towards equity, collaboration, organizational health and creativity. Since 2005, she has been playing with play-based learning and transformation through Theatre of the Oppressed, InterPlay, and more recently sacred clowning. She is deeply serious and deeply playful at once, believing in the need for strategies that include creativity & play as ways to open up the fields of possible transformations, and reconnecting our mind, body, heart and spirit. She is based in Tio:tia’ke/Montreal, on the shores of the Iroquois River and works with Bloom Consulting.

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES: 

• Host a retreat to create a theory of change.
• Build an internal team to steward and champion a change initiative. 
• Be a wise fool and practice not knowing. 
• Share stories to naturally overcome any illusionary divide.
• Create a circle where everyone has an opportunity to speak from the heart and hear from one another is a safe structure. It is not a space for interruption or rebuttal. Often there is a question at the center. 
• In a moment of feeling stuck, ask, ‘What is the next most graceful step?’

IDEAS: 

• We can't lead people somewhere where we haven't gone.
• Nothing is supposed to be perfect - this is a legacy of white supremacist culture. 
• Your way of being can also help an organization grow. 
• It’s possible to have a shared purpose and to play at work. 
• People trust solutions they are part of building. 
• We can create participation for different parts of ourselves. 
• A small group is a fractal of change and a place to practice our wisdom about change. 
• Sacred clowning helps people not fall into dogma or a singular truth that would confine the unknown mysteries of the world. These clowns also spoke truth to power.  
• The clown lets go of perfectionism, accepts offers, is deeply alive and in awe of the miracle of life.
• Connecting with one’s inner clown can be liberating because we are letting out our unknown desires. 
• Playing games with groups helps the magic of life pour out of ourselves. 
• There is a strong bridge between mindfulness and playfulness. Play stills our mind, pushes away distractions, and brings us to the present. 
• When we see each other in our vulnerability and our imperfection there is an outpouring of love. There are obstacles and barriers to giving and receiving that love. 
• Playing and risk taking can help shed some of the barriers to connection. 
• We can work in partnership towards a dream of us being human and free.

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Karla Kerr is a holistic funeral director and death doula whose mission is to reclaim death care and bring it back into the community. She focuses on creating safe spaces for open and honest conversations about end of life options with less euphemism and more clarity.  Karla is passionate about sharing the knowledge and experience she has gained from working in traditional funeral homes and does so with a healthy dose of levity and humour. 

Website: https://karlakerr.ca/

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES: 

• Find creative ways to talk about death: Death over dinner conversation, Death café, Death over drafts. Use entry way conversation starters to ease into the topic. 
• Talk about your end of life with your family so they know how to act in your interest. Let them know what would be worse than dying and let that inform the decisions you make. 
• When dying, return to the senses and find moments of pleasure and joy. These will be unique to each person. Prepare beforehand by telling the people around you about the things that bring you pleasure, so they can make sure you have access to them.
• Find ways of connecting to activities that you used to enjoy together. 
• Show love to yourself by tuning into what you really want, free from expectations of how you should be. Connect to your true needs. 
• Help protect the time of someone who is dying. 
• You can deeply honor the dying person by honoring their values and requests at the end of life. You are celebrating them exactly as they are. 
• If you have remorse or regret regarding someone who has passed, give space for it not to be ok, the pain and the heartache. 
• Draw comfort from people who have already died. You can continue to be in connection with them in a way that makes sense to you. 
• Alternatives to cremation: Alkaline hydrolysis (water cremation), Terramation (human composting). 
• Imagine leaving this life feeling a lightness in your soul. 

IDEAS: 

• Death is an opportunity to be grateful for what we have (ex. walking and breathing), and to take vulnerable risks by speaking what we truly feel and following the dreams we have been putting off. 
• It is easy to hide from our true desires by telling ourselves we will follow them in the future. Sometimes the future comes and we are no longer able to. 
• We have a finite amount of time and we don't know how much time that is. 
• Acceptance doesn't mean being ok with what is happening, but acknowledging it is happening and determining how to best move forward.  
• There are two kinds of death: sudden and prolonged. Today, most people live a prolonged death. 
• Dying people want authentic and deep connection & relationships .
• You don’t need to see everyone that wants to see you when you’re dying. 
• Focus on the needs of the dying person. Their needs become small and pure.  
• Common regrets include working too much, putting family aside, not pursuing a dream, holding a grudge.
• There are concentric circles around the person who is dying. We lean in when we can offer support, we lean out when we need support. 
• We don’t reach the end of life with perfection, and everything doesn’t close perfectly. 
• You can’t take away the sadness of someone leaving forever. 
• The death positivity movement allows us to reduce anxiety around death.

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Priestess Francesca is an internationally renowned relationship coach, sexy educator, dominatrix, and sassy writer on all things hard (cocks and emotions).  She’s walked the path most are too scared to even peek at and is here to turn your repressed fantasies into powerful tools for healing, growth, and straight-up self-acceptance.

Her insights have been featured in Cosmopolitan, Business Insider, Health Magazine, and on top 1% podcasts worldwide.  

In addition, Francesca’s groundbreaking ideas have been shared at universities like Salve Regina and Sarah Lawrence, and at prominent festivals such as Envision, Dom Con, and Toronto Tantra Festival.  

Her mission is simple: Help you own your desires, embrace your full self, and see sex as a powerful tool for transformation. Because pleasure isn’t just play: it’s your power move.

LINKS: 

Trauma, Kink & Somatic Healing: Watch Now For Free

Threshold Ritual: Download the Free Guide

Freak School 1:1 Intensive: Claim Your Permission

PRACTICES:

• Ask yourself: why do you heal?
• Make it safe to not be safe.
• Do a height check before engaging in these practices. Do you know what a yes or a no feels like in your body? When you do, how liberated is your throat around your truth? Can you speak it? How do you respond when someone has a tornado in the face of your truth? How anchored can you remain?
• Let your fantasy inform your reality by allowing your imagination to be present in it.
• Fill out feedback sheets after scenes.
• Negotiate aftercare and integration before a scene.

IDEAS: 

• Pearls of beauty are often found in the depths of darkness. There is grace and beauty in places that feel scary.
• If we wholeheartedly believe something doesn’t exist, we won’t look for it.
• Night vision is needed when looking into dark depths; you have to see beneath the surface.
• When you meet in a place of darkness where society’s rules can’t hold, you drop deeper and the heart can crack open.
• Healing is becoming more okay with who you naturally are.
• Everyone carries desires related to BDSM; we often don’t give ourselves permission to find something hot.
• A strong goal orientation can become oppressive.
• You don’t need to figure out exactly what you’re healing—don’t turn healing into recess homework.
• You have to trust that your desire will reveal its fruit to you.
• We live in a society full of ideas about what sex should look like.
• Therapy often tries to move you away from recreating traumatic experiences, away from what hurt you. But what if part of healing is going into it differently?
• We will hurt each other without meaning to; restorative repair is essential.
• There are often gendered stereotypes within “conscious sexuality” communities.
• This is healing work. If we can deepen intimacy when we’re naked, we can deepen intimacy when we’re clothed.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Parneet is a human being inspired by the resilience and healing abilities of the human heart, mind and body. Her life is oriented towards the liberation and wholeness of all beings including herself. Parneet works as a counsellor and somatic experiencing practitioner in private practice, as well as a mindfulness and authentic relating facilitator. 

PRACTICE 

• Dancing to house music - a channel for love, freedom, connection & community. 
• Question why a creative practice keeps being postponed - what is getting in the way of spontaneously erupting into play ? 
• Use a sock puppet to externalize shame, or allow the shame itself to be the artistic director of a project. 
• To work with shadow, bring it to the light and see what it has to say. We just need to be big enough, brave enough, and compassionate enough.
• We need to biologically prepare for conflict - sleep, eating, the day of the week, etc. 

IDEAS 

Shadow

• Shadow is the unconscious hidden, repressed and denied parts of ourselves that the ego has rejected. Those shadow parts are secretly behind the wheel. 
• People are terrified of being themselves for a reason. It often connects to childhood moments when someone’s authentic version was judged or shamed. 
• When shadow is just reacting to being repressed, we are actually just seeing the reaction of shadow, not the shadow itself. 
• So much healing can happen when we observe, notice, welcome, love and embrace shadow. It dissolves naturally as it doesn’t want to be there. 
• We are always in relationship with shadow. Often, its impulse is to protect. 

Shame 

• It is so vulnerable to be seen when there is the possibility of being evaluated for something that is heart centered. 
• Sometimes being seen can take you out of your creative vibe. 
• Shame has a biological function as an inhibitor in service of social belonging and good social connections. It becomes generalized however; instead of being connected to something we are doing, it becomes attached to an essence. This is why identity related traumas are so confusing - the shame is about 'me'. This needs to end. 
• To let shame go, we need to trust we will remain connected to our essence. For some of us, our entire lives have been shaped by shame. 

Intersectionality & play 

• The discernment - am I safe or am I in danger - is a constant assessment as a queer racialized person. 
• Intersectionality affects everything when it comes to playfulness.
• People who are silly & playful have the privilege of feeling safe to do so. We can have compassion for the microaggressions that have gotten in the way of other people not being able to show up playfully. 
• Safety is a prerequisite to play & creativity. 

Conflict 

• Conflict requires a strong container, otherwise the nervous system will seek to protect you. 
• I've seen conflict resolve beautifully, with deeper and more loving & trusting relationships when there is intentionality, consent and a container. 

Group Facilitation 

Move away from predict and control to sense and respond when working with groups. 

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Hayley Simons is a Child Development and Behaviour Specialist, Certified Child Sleep Consultant, and owner of Hayley the Parent Coach. In her Canada-based practice, Hayley supports millennial parents who want to parent in a way that honours and respects their child, and breaks the cycle of punitive parenting patterns. Learn more at www.hayleytheparentcoach.ca.

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES: 

• To enjoy playing with a child, pay close attention to their interests and find activities that both of you enjoy. 
• Gather hints about their interests by paying attention to their environment, and find gateways to connection.
• To help the child create a secure attachment, try to understand and respond appropriately to their specific needs. You are trying to build a safe world with a level of predictability. 
• In difficult moments, the trick is to maintain the connection. Children often feel adults don’t understand what they are going through. Instead of trying to change or stop the behaviour or create a power struggle, connect with the child, get down to their level and look at the world from their perspective. 
• Use simple direct questions to help the child connect with how they were feeling. Did that make you feel bad? What about this didn’t feel good? Focus on simple, accessible language. 
• When giving agency and autonomy, make sure they are age appropriate. For instance, you can offer two options instead of a broad question asking what they would like to eat. The result is that the child can feel more control over their environment. 
• You can apologize to your kids when you make a mistake. 
• If you receive criticism of yourself as a parent from your children, receive the comments with grace without taking things personally. Perception is reality. No matter how hard you try, they won’t like something you did.  

IDEAS: 

• Kids naturally don’t care about you doing the right thing, or filling the space with conversation. They just want to play with them on their level. 
• Kids like concrete, specific words and questions, not vague questions about the past or the future (ex. What are you doing today?)
• Play schemas are the ways kids make sense of the world through repeated behaviours. Help them find a healthy expression of the schema. 
• We need to model how to sit with emotions without viewing them as good or bad. 
• Often when they are being punitive, parents are feeling a loss of control and are focusing on the surface level difficult behaviour. 
• Children don’t know how to emotionally regulate, that is our job. It’s not helpful for the adult to freak out. They are still learning what is socially acceptable and how to express themselves.
• You can’t force a child to do something don’t want to do or aren’t ready for. Kids are people and we cannot control them. 
• When we set boundaries with children, we are doing it to teach what is ok and what isn’t ok, without shaming and while keeping their dignity intact. 
• Filling your own cup as a parent is important. As a consequence, you can show up for your kids more consistently, with calm, patience and the level of responsiveness that is needed. 
• Parents need a support system. They need to understand that they can do it all, what their own needs are, what makes them feel good, how to set boundaries, and how to sit with uncomfortable feelings.  
• It’s ok for things to be hard.
• There is no need to try for perfect parenting, that doesn’t exist. 

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-GUEST BIOGRAPHY-

Nadia is a multi-disciplinary artist, community arts facilitator and facilitation trainer. She is known for her ability to clarify and simplify complex concepts, to work joyfully with participant resistance and challenging dynamics, to engage powerful diversity and inclusion practices, and for her creative and bold arts-based group process design. She is the founder of The Time Zone Research Lab (community arts-based research into the nature of Time) and Toolsi (on demand facilitation training).

More about Nadia Chaney:

www.nadiachaney.com

https://www.linkedin.com/in/nadia-chaney-59637021/

https://www.instagram.com/eternalflux_/

 Link to Toolsi: https://facilitate.toolsi.ca/

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES: 

• Oracular Poetry - a process to answer unanswerable questions.
• Play with acausal stories, maps & drawings with children. 
• To tune into the group, expand to the underlying mind in the room. Where does it want to go ? 
• Use psychodrama to explore other forms and ways of knowing that are transpersonal.
• Use the metaphor of moving from the small room to the big room to get a wider perspective through regulation of the nervous system.
• Visualization practices where you travel to a safe space as well as anchoring gestures can help us regulate our nervous systems by slightly adjusting the dial. 
• Shaking is a baby step towards dance and the disinhibition of dance.
• Build up embodied experience with the tools before you need them. 
• Go for a walk without a destination. 

IDEAS: 

Play

• If they can fail at it, it's not play, even if it's a game. You can lose but you can't fail. 
• In play, we open our senses to the swirl of possibility and where the playful can take fire. 
• Place requires preparation (what made the container possible) and has repercussions after having been disinhibited.
• An ensemble mentality requires having your senses open so wide that you move, see and breathe together.
• Play has no usefulness in that way. It is useful but it doesn't have a use function. There is an emancipatory side to it: can I take time to do what I want, without getting better ? Can I simply be in pleasure ? 

A culture of extraction 

• In a capitalist structure, so many things are considered useless until they are sucked up. Yet, those things that are useless and abject are also beautiful and valuable. This also goes for relationships. We can strive to this inner state of non-succumbing to effectiveness and usefulness. 
• Study can also be play when you take away the burden of being efficient. 
• What is on the other side of the current of productivity is where innovation lives. 

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Emily is a mixed-race settler (Chinese/white) based out of Montreal, the traditional and unceded territories of the Kanien’kehá:ka, They are passionate about their work as a consultant and facilitator and have close to 10 years of experience in anti-oppressive change management, human resources, conflict mediation & curriculum design.

PRACTICES: 

• Tap into image, sensation, or metaphor to get a more somatic, accurate read on what’s happening in the group.
• Normalize playful banter—it softens the space and invites levity.
• Physically explore inner tensions or polarities (e.g. “I want chicken / I want tofu”) by stepping into each perspective. Then return to center to hold both truths and reflect on what’s needed to integrate them.
• When interpersonal tension arises, pause and ask: What’s creating this dynamic? Often, it’s unspoken needs or unclear boundaries.
• Let small facilitator “flaws” (e.g. messy handwriting, imperfect flipcharts) model that it’s okay not to be on top of everything.
• Use art, metaphor, storytelling, roleplay, or fidget tools to engage imagination and ease.
• Track and share your inner state (e.g. “I feel a little tense”), and name group dynamics (e.g. people fidgeting or looking away). It builds shared awareness.
• Notice how resistance shows up in yourself or the group. There’s wisdom in it—it can be a diagnostic tool.

IDEAS: 

• Honouring every voice—rational or emotional—helps surface the real conversations a group needs to have.
• When a group repeats a dynamic, they’re “cycling.” Awareness of this helps break the loop.
• Group shifts can happen at the individual, one-on-one, or group level—each one impacts the others.
• We all hold multiple roles (e.g. joker, carer). Creating comfort in shifting between them fosters relational wisdom and shared responsibility.
• If there’s tension or a marginalized voice, lean in—there’s often opportunity and insight there.
• Don’t exile your needs—learning to notice and name them helps deepen group connection.
• We’re allowed to show up grumpy, tired, or joyful. Creating space for the full range of being human is essential.
• Joy, happiness, and lightness also need a safe space to be expressed—not just struggle.
• Every group carries a pressure to perform—even without suits and ties. Loosening this helps people show up more authentically.
• Conflict is often more tolerable than the fear of it. It doesn’t have to be intense—it can be held with curiosity and care.
• To create safety in a group, we must first feel safe within ourselves.

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-GUEST BIOGRAPHY-

Jacques W. Martiquet is on a mission to end the rise of loneliness and depression. Known as the International Party Scientist, he has been interviewed by VICE, CTV, Global News and Elle. After completing his degree in Pharmacology, he traveled to 13 countries igniting hundreds of sober parties in public spaces. He's on Earth to equip innovative leaders with science-based human connection tools for their company events, so that their wellness & culture budget translates into lasting results.

More about Jacques: 

https://www.linkedin.com/in/thepartyscientist/

https://thepartyscientist.com/

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES: 

• Take social risks to enable other people to feel safe to take them as well.
• Do social reps to detach from other peoples’ reactions & judgement (ex. laugh like a maniac, wave at people, etc.) 
• To develop a stronger capacity to take risks, start journaling and practice introspection; the barriers are personal.
• With a group, start with mindfulness, gratitude, and stretching to bring people into the moment. Then, raise the threshold of acceptable expression. 
• If you are in public and facilitating without a container, create a new context to support the interactions. 
• Look at the thought patterns and people in your social circle that aren't supporting you and replace them. 
• To prepare yourself for joy facilitation, put your feet up against the wall, take deep breaths, put music on, and do visualizations that connect you to moments of joy. Then dance, and bring yourself energy by connecting to the people in your session. 

IDEAS: 

• We can all be facilitators of shared experiences in our gathering spaces.
• Social risk taking has more rewards than potential harm. 
• When you take a risk as a facilitator and are rejected, remind yourself that you are developing your capacity to serve groups. When you fail, it means you are becoming better. 
• Many facilitators don't want to make people uncomfortable. What if we viewed safety through the lens of expanding our boundaries? 
• So much of our ability to have fun is a reflection of our physiology.
• In conflict, embrace a fail forward mentality. 
• It is a red flag if there is no conflict in a relationship - the no is what allows you to trust someone’s yes. 
• In every group, the pro-social energy is latent. When we synchronize the group, we unlock energy that wasn't possible if everyone was doing their own thing.

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About Emily

Emily Hinks is the founder of Mischief Makers, a global facilitation agency helping teams collaborate in more creative, human, and effective ways. She is also the co-founder of Routes In, a nonprofit helping young people from underrepresented backgrounds enter the creative industries.

In this episode

• Redefining success beyond growth and revenue
• The “mirror ceiling” faced by women in leadership
• Moving through imposter syndrome and fear of visibility
• Building resilience as a founder
• Starting ambitious ideas through small experiments
• Working with ADHD and dyslexia as strengths
• Creating systems and communities that support your brilliance

Simple practices

• Turn up the confidence dial: Name your accomplishments without minimizing them.
• Create secret KPIs: Define success using the experiences and impact that truly matter to you.
• Notice the hesitation: Catch the moment when you make yourself smaller before speaking clearly.
• Start lightly: Explore an idea through one conversation, gathering, or experiment.
• Design for your brain: Build structures that make it easier to use your natural strengths.
• Borrow a better mirror: Stay close to people who can reflect your brilliance back to you.

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Kara Latta is a Play & Mindset Coach and the founder of The Playful Warrior, a platform focused on helping high-achieving individuals overcome perfectionism and reconnect with their authentic selves through play. Using techniques like NLP, hypnotherapy, and EFT, Kara’s coaching programs encourage creativity, joy, and personal growth.

LINKS: 

www.theplayfulwarrior.com 

PRACTICES: 

• Soothe your body with gentle touch or self-talk to shift out of fear and return to a calm, logical state.
• Reassure your mind by gathering real-world examples that show taking risks, like being visible online, is survivable.
• Treat action as a playful experiment where trying, failing, and learning are all part of the process.
• Understand that being seen online is an important step toward growing your business.
• Mute people who discourage your self-expression and show up for the version of you that once needed permission to be free.
• Each month, choose one or two activities that generate income and genuinely light you up to stay aligned and energized.
• Start each day by tackling one important task that moves your work forward.

IDEAS: 

• Perfectionism is not about thinking you're perfect, but about never feeling good enough and using that to avoid judgment.
• As children, we often learn to value getting things right over expressing ourselves, which leads us to adapt in order to belong.
• Play helps us reconnect with our true selves and heal perfectionism by making the process more important than the outcome.
• Doing things that are aligned doesn't always feel easy, and challenge can still mean you're on the right path.
• When someone judges you, it usually reflects their own limitations or fears, not your value, and you can choose to respond with compassion.
• If you're being fully authentic, some rejection is inevitable, and if you're not being rejected at all, you may be hiding parts of yourself.
• Achievement that comes from play builds trust and self-love, while perfectionist achievement is driven by fear.
• Letting go of where you think you should be allows you to honour your own timeline and path.
• Perfectionism can also show up in healing, so it's important to offer yourself compassion instead of expecting to do personal growth perfectly.

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Kai Cheng Thom is a cultural worker, mediator, facilitator, pleasure activist & writer. She has incorporated skills grown from crisis intervention, trauma-informed activism, community mental health practice, and somatics in order to develop a facilitation style that is gentle, boundaried, accessible, and fiercely compassionate. She is the author of the novel Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars: A Dangerous Trans Girl's Confabulous Memoir, the essay collection I Hope We Choose Love: A Trans Girl's Notes at the End of the World, and the poetry collection a place called No Homeland. 

More about Kai Cheng:

• https://kaichengthom.com/
• https://ariseembodiment.org/  
• www.instagram.com/kaichengthom 

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES: 

• Repeat what someone has said without any additions or reservations. Disconnect the 'I'm listening' & 'here's why you're wrong' parts of your speech. 
• Ask someone, 'is there anything else that you want me to know ?' Or, 'is there anything else that you'd like me to understand?'
• When listening, notice how your perspective might actually change from the beginning of the conversation. 
• After you’ve listened, ask, 'are you feeling able to hear my perspective?’

IDEAS: 

Conflict

• Each human being is sovereign (right to body, thoughts, feelings, fantasies, my sexuality, i.e. 'my domain'). Often our sovereign spaces have overlap and conflict is born. 
• When someone reaches past the threshold of the overlap and tries to force or coerce, that goes into the realm of harm.
• When working with conflict with a group, we try to lift people’s resistance into the conscious space and look at it with love. 
• Every relationship is unique and there is no one size fits all conflict process.
• Conflict resolution needs to be a consent based process for it to work. 
• Running away is a great survival mechanism. People don’t need to remain in a relationship.
• Jungian shadow is an unintegrated or unwanted part of the self. We often project our shadow onto other people. 
• Having a value compass helps us to guide our behaviour in conflict. 
• Accountability can be divided into account (telling the story) and ability (the capacity to do so). We should focus on building capacity instead of punishing. 

Victimhood

• We often want to keep conversation focused on our own injury, which is a convenient excuse to not reflect on our own errors. 
• It can be easy to conflate harm and abuse and interpersonal conflict. 
• Narratives of victimhood often co-exist in overlapping layers. 
• By remaining connected to our own sacredness, we are better able to listen and hear others’ perceptions of us.

Humour

• Humor can be an ally in challenging situations. This said, we need to focus on rehumanizing the other person, not dehumanizing them. 
• There is room for play in the ritual around conflict. E.g. the prompt ‘share something you would rather be doing today’.

Book recommendations 

• The hero with a thousand faces by Joseph Campbell
• Conflict Is Not Abuse: Overstating Harm, Community Responsibility, and the Duty of Repair, by Sarah Schulman

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Monica Paraghamian (she/her/elle) is an educator, artist and entrepreneur. When she isn’t singing gospel or working on the second edition of her children’s book on mindfulness, she’s designing and facilitating learning experiences for youth and adults. Monica believes that every person is chalk-full of talents, and that much of life is about the unfolding and exploration of these. 

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICE 

• Sing an operatic version of la vie en rose. 
• Enact characters through musical improvisation. 
• Put on an accent and do a prank call.
• Junk playgrounds. Children go in, and figure it out ! 
• Spoil yourself for the day. 
• Explore abandoned buildings.
• Simply hold the space when someone shares a long winded story. The goal isn’t to fix problems - people figure it out & everything will be ok. 
• Experiment with different plot structures for experience design. Ex. the conclusion at the beginning. 

IDEAS

Play 

• Play is having fun and not worrying about outcomes while not harming anyone. 

Creative sharing

• Putting someone on the spot is not conducive to some sharing.  
• The key to expressing yourself is your relation to the craft. Ex. instead of thinking about insecurities, if I share other people will also want to share ! 
• Consider the blockages - why aren't I able to share on the spot ? 

Boundaries 

• Pema Chodron - idiot compassion. Allowing boundaries to co-exist with our compassion.
• By having boundaries, you are showing someone that they can also have boundaries. 
• By having strong boundaries you elevate the relationship with yourself & the other person. 

Experience Design 

• The container & space needs to feel safe. You have to properly nurture it. 
• You're hosting people before the event.
• Provide structure but also allow space to open the gates to chaos.  

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Makaylah is a passionate mental health advocate and speaker who creates spaces that bring down walls, deepen connection and foster empathy. Makaylah is a neurodivergent, queer, non-binary, trauma survivor with a raw, yet relatable approach. They share stories that humanize hard truths, make us laugh and bring us together.

Their advocacy work spans vital topics such as anxiety & depression, mental illness, neurodiversity, LGBTQ+ education, suicide prevention, sexual violence and more. By breaking stigma and fostering open conversations, Makaylah envisions a world where everyone feels a sense of belonging and safety. As a social impact entrepreneur, Makaylah co-owns two businesses with their wife, Fia- Lynn Crandall (she/her).

Through their first, Scale Naturally, they work with socially conscious organisations to maximize impact by nurturing the unique potential of leaders and teams. Through their innovative approach to Inclusive Leadership and Diversity initiatives, they help cultivate a Culture of Care where everyone can contribute authentically, leading to enhanced productivity and wellbeing.

Additionally, their business Frankie D's Donuts is on a mission to reduce loneliness… one Donut at a time. Their made-from-scratch Donuts serve as a conduit for connection among people, emphasizing the importance of community and fostering meaningful connections. They run workshops with their Donuts acting as an important ingredient for real change.

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES: 

• Throw out the rule book of what joy or play should look like. 
• Allow yourself to start with small actions. 
• Think about something that meets you where you are at. 
• Reflect on who you are, what you like, what you don’t like and what joy actually looks like to you. This will take some experimentation. 
• Each day do one thing that brings you joy. 
• At the beginning of the day think about how you will have joy that day (ex. what you will do for yourself or how you will take care of yourself) 
• At the end of the day reflect on something that felt good and one thing that didn’t feel good. 
• Set up preventative measures with friends ahead of time. 
• Find solutions with friends where everyone’s needs are met. 

IDEAS: 

• Joy and play can also be masks or coping mechanisms. 
• You can’t see mental illness. 
• Part of healing is knowing what you like, your feelings, and your needs, and how to communicate those things to other people. 
• The goal of therapy is not to get fixed, but rather to find, love and care for yourself. 
• Everyone has physical and mental health. Mental health is like chronic physical disease. 
• We need to take time to recharge our battery. 
• All emotions are normal and valid. 
• A lot of self-care practices come from a privileged lense. 
• Allow yourself to add nuance in your understanding of joy. 
• Images of joy that we are shown are often unattainable. 
• We can have gratitude for our coping mechanisms. 
• Have self-compassion and acceptance for our coping mechanisms. 
• Feeling less alone is the first step.

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Adam Kol is The Couples Financial Coach. He helps couples go from financial overwhelm or fighting to clarity, teamwork, and peace of mind.

Adam is a Certified Financial Therapist - Level I™, Certified Mediator, and Tax Attorney with a Duke Law degree and a Master's in Tax Law from NYU. He is a husband, dog dad, musician, and social justice advocate, as well.

Adam has been quoted in The Wall Street Journal, Marie Claire, CNBC, and more.

Website: https://www.couplesfinancialcoach.com/ 

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES: 

• Imagine you have $10 000 and you have to spend it on yourself. What would you spend it on? 
• Look at your credit card bill and notice what comes up for you as you look at your expenses. 
• Seek out financial resources that will prompt your thinking. 

IDEAS: 

• Money has a tactical aspect as well as a human/emotional/spiritual side. It is complex and for many people a taboo subject. 
• Reflect on your relationship to money. Where does that relationship come from? Are there aspects of that relationship that aren’t aligned? 
• Money connects to history, context, narratives, gender and race. The mindsets that were developed in these contexts were passed on. 
• Money can meet deeper needs. For instance, buying your time and energy back, giving security and peace of mind & knowing you’re on track towards your goals.  
• The four money scripts (avoidance, worship, status, vigilance) is a popular way of understanding different relationships to money. 
• Finding financial balance requires aligning with your values, needs and wants.
• Balance comes from both self-awareness and trial and error. 
• When there are fears around money, show up with compassion and acceptance. 
• There are a few core concepts in finance that are easy to understand: income, expenses, assets, debts, and interest rates. You can learn how they are related and how they connect to your goals. 
• No matter how much money you have, there will always be stressors. 
• Confronting money issues can give you a sense of empowerment.

RESOURCES: 

• www.richandregular.com 
• www.stefanieoconnell.com
• www.jenhemphill.com 
• www.heyberna.com 
• www.moneysmartlatina.com 
• www.resourcegeneration.org 

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Excited to share this first episode with the sparkly emotional explorer Cleo da Fonseca with you. We do a deep dive into emotions as a form of play and liberation. 

Cleo da Fonseca is a theater artist, educator and puppeteer who lives in Tiohtià:ke, also known as Montreal. She co-runs a theater company for young audiences called “Théâtre de la flamme” with Carolina Chmielewski; the focus of their productions are the “protagonism” of youth in each story. Cleo also works as a nature school educator with kids and teens where she finds deep connection with the natural world.

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES 

• Sing & act out the scenes from a musical or a song. Create a show out of it !  
• Forum theater, developed by Augosto Boal. People from the audience are invited to come on stage and take a role in the conflict. You then explore the best strategy for the people involved. Theatre gives the possibility of experiencing life in many different ways, both by being a witness & by being an active participant. 
• In conflict, experiment with breaking the rhythm - ex. switch from an intellectual focus, or integrate physicality to gain extra information that will influence how you arrive at a conclusion, through a better understanding of the emotion. 
• Enjoy the process of designing a game and its rules. Sometimes this process can be longer than the actual game !
• If someone doesn't want to connect with a high energy state, consider what your underlying need is and how you can meet that need. 

IDEAS

Emotions

• We often feel multiple things simultaneously. 
• There is great value experiencing the complexity of the emotions. 
• Emotions can be better understood through connecting them to metaphor & other concepts, regardless if they 'make sense'.
• Move beyond the so-called universal emotions. 
• Emotions are the motions of life. Emotions help the unknown be known. 
• The body transforms the feeling, and the feeling transforms the body. 
• Create a web of understanding instead of a categorized box. Just experience as it actually is. 
• Use emotion as a way to communicate and connect to other beings & invite other beings to experience that fullness. 
• When you are scared to experience your emotions: breathe, feel the air coming in. Be kind to yourself. 
• Keeping respect at the forefront. 
• Collective experiencing of a moment is very empowering. 
• There is a cultural component to being free to express intense emotions.  
• Learn how to simmer down, and actually meet people where they're at. 

When we tune into someone else, they will want to tune into us. There is a tendency towards balance and harmony. 

Relationships 

• Respecting someone's desire to not engage is a form of connection.
• Relationships remain even if you aren't in contact with them anymore, and the relationship continues to transform. 
• Developing an inner confidence that things transform, and that you don't need to control them. 
• Play to move through conflict while acknowledging that what is under the surface is deep. 

Experience design

• Inspiring locations create inspiring experiences. 

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-GUEST BIOGRAPHY-

Jessica Fern is a Psychotherapist, Coach, and Certified Clinical Trauma Professional. Jessica is the author of Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, and Nonmonogamy and The Polysecure Workbook: Healing Your Attachment and Creating Security in Loving Relationships. In her international private practice, Jessica works with individuals, couples, and people in multiple-partner relationships who no longer want to be limited by their reactive patterns, cultural conditioning, insecure attachment styles, and past traumas, helping them to embody new possibilities in life and love. Learn more at JessicaFern.com. 

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES: 

• Allow yourself to be the designer of the relationships of your life. Use trial and error and conversations to get there. 
• Be creative when choosing empowering language to describe a relationship or celebrating a commitment. 
• Identify your shared interests and pleasures in a relationship. 
• Close your eyes and bring all the channels of purpose that go outside of yourself back in. Then, sit, feel and breathe. 

IDEAS:

• A safe haven is when a caretaker responds to our physical and emotional needs. 
• A secure base is what allows us to venture into the world and take risks. 
• Free yourself from a rigid definition of what play and fun are. 
• Another way of exploring play is looking at what makes you feel alive. 
• Sexploration: feeling safe to explore new areas in sex (ex. wrestling, pillow fighting, playing tricks).
• Ethical non-monogamy is an umbrella term that describes having multiple partners while everyone knows. 
• Instead of calling someone an ex, use the term that best describes your current relationship. 
• If a relationship ends, instead of thinking it should have been longer, celebrate and accept what it was. 
• An attachment relationship is one where people mutually rely on each other (ex. partner, friend, family). 
• A rigid binary doesn’t encapsulate the experience of being human. 
• It takes a village to raise a child and people are getting creative about what that village might look like. 
• Expressed delight: delight for the beingness of someone. 
• Compersion: the happiness we feel when our partners are with other people. 
• It’s easy to push our emotions onto others like a hot potato instead of sitting with them.
• Polyamory requires respect, agreements, consent and consideration. 
• Prepare a care strategy before having a primal attachment panic (before, during, after, and healing modalities).
• Codependent = I’m not ok without you.
• Interdependent = I'm ok when I'm not with you, and I love it when I'm with you.
• You are the source of your happiness and purpose. 

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Jess Malz, Founder and CEO of Inbo, is driven by a passion for reshaping the future of work through dynamic, participatory, and collaborative processes. With over fifteen years of experience in learning experience design, facilitation, and leadership coaching, they’re dedicated to pushing boundaries and fostering growth. Their true joy lies in empowering leaders to embrace creativity, agility, and whole-heartedness. 

Juniper Belshaw, executive coach, facilitator, and managing partner at Inbo, has 15+ years experience guiding senior leaders and their teams towards increased performance, strengthened leadership, and better work relationships in organisations like Cirque du Soleil, Mila-Quebec AI Institute, David Suzuki Foundation, and federal and provincial governments. She’s passionate about building cultures of belonging where all people, including those from equity-deserving groups, can bring their full gifts to the table without barriers.

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES: 

• Practice the erotic mundane: laughing, taking care of animals, cooking, dancing, lighting candles, hiking, cleaning, folding laundry, puttering. 
• Give your partner reassurance that you aren't going anywhere.
• Create a couple’s voice. 
• Do group therapy together - it can be fun! 
• Make it a priority for both people to be their authentic selves. 
• Commit to whatever is arising in the moment. Actually drop in and go through it together, e.g. ‘this is what is happening for me’, ‘this is what I'm scared of’. 
• When a conflict pattern emerges (ex. A figure eight), disarm it by: taking off your clothes, lying on the floor, taking a breath and pausing, having empathy, exaggerate what the other person is saying. 
• Know when a conflict won’t lead to more insight in the moment. 
• Facilitate your own retreat for you and your partner. 
• Take a weekend away in a hotel with your partner. 
• Make intentional time to connect together. 
• Debrief every week together. 

IDEAS: 

• A relationship can be seen as a commitment to growth and learning and evolution. 
• People get cranky before relationship and after they are in relationships. 
• The couple can be a healing ground. 
• It’s best to look at the baggage each person brings. Then you can notice the impact it is having today. 
• Sometimes relationships just work out. 
• There is infinite insight and depth in each person. 
• Remove the expectation there will be a moment when there aren’t conflicts or fights in the relationship. 
• Vitality can come from fully exploring and living what is right in front of you.

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-GUEST BIOGRAPHY-

I am a mystic, mentor & ritualist. My practice weaves together Sexual Shamanism, Neo-Tantra, Animism, Shadow Alchemy, Somatics, Womb Wisdom, and Temple Arts. My work is my prayer and my prayer is this: Let us reclaim the wisdom of our bodies, harness the raw life-force of our sexuality and show up with true agency in the world. Let us decolonize our minds, bodies and spirits and activate the wild genius of our primordial nature. And let us find the way forward oriented by love, not fear.

More about Jovana: 

• www.sorormystica.ca 

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES: 

• Get really curious about the body and the sensations that arise from the body. This taps us into a full spectrum existence. 
• While connecting to sensation, also surrender to movement and flow. Liberate your body, use sound and let your body take the lead. We need to get out of grooves of habit. 
• Use this same curiosity about sexuality and stop being finish line oriented. How does this energy want to move through you? One thing you might discover is that you are alive!  
• Instead of forcing an activity, invite an energy and a state of being and allow participants to find their own path. 
• Use dance as a way to make major life decisions. 

IDEAS: 

• Connecting to death and sickness brings us deeper into life. 
• The idea of sin is woven into our society. Implicit in this idea is the notion of lifting out of this existence to achieve something in another realm. This ascension path is insidious: it vilified the body, our experiences, our sexuality and our pleasure. 
• As part of this notion of ascension, we seek states of happiness and fulfillment that don’t take into account the natural cycles of our bodies and the world we are a part of. 
• We reject going down into the darkness and the void, and instead impossibly try to focus on the eternal bloom.
• There is a portal available if we truly open to the full spectrum of life, including the wretchedness, the pain, the wisdom and the joy of it.
• Emotional polarities are on a continuum. 
• We are part of a much larger organism that includes the land, the insects and the animals, and perhaps much more. We are a part of it all.
• Sexual energy is a pathway to the divine and to your power. 
• A life of love is a practice, not an idea. 
• Play is about going to the edges, the perimeters of the playground. 
• Connecting to the truth and the depth of our experience is a very natural process: this is already a part of ourselves. 
• Tantra is a non-dual path. There is a charge in a duality like doing & being. When you hold both those polarities, there is a spark that allows a holy third that emerges. We realize those polarities don’t exist. 
• Shadow is our blind spot - it is an unconscious expression of something related to a wounding. It is subverted energy that manifests itself in ways we might not be conscious of. 
• Our work is to shine a gentle light on our shadows. Ask them, what do you need ? How can I advocate for you ? Speak for you ? Hold you ? Integrate you ? 

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Jessica Wallace is a Marriage and Family Therapist based in San Francisco, California. 

PRACTICES: 

• Simply say no. For instance, you could say, “No, not today,” or “That won’t work for me,” or “I didn’t like that.”
•  Find a way to let anger move somatically through your body. For example, shake, jump, run, pound a pillow, sigh, or push energy through your feet.
• You don’t always need to process your anger relationally; you can work with it on your own.
• Train your anger response in advance by preparing specific sentences. Identify which phrases you’re missing and create them for easy use.
• When you notice anger in someone else, you can mirror it back to them. Then, observe if any defenses arise and work with the person to address them.
• Reflect on how anger was or wasn’t expressed in your family. As a primary emotion, it likely played a significant role in your childhood.
• If you write an angry message, leave it for a while, then revisit it later.
• When you are angry, tell the other person, “I’m not going to hurt you.” Be explicit about creating a sense of safety.
• Integrate play into situations of anger in creative ways. For example, you could say, “You’re making that angry face! Go take a look in the mirror.” We can approach our emotions lightly, bringing humour to the experience.
• When faced with anger, respond with love. This can feel very supportive. You might say, “I love you, I am here.”
• If you need to take space, tell the other person, “I need to take space. And I love you, and I’ll be back.”
• Start by building awareness of how anger energy shifts in your body. You might begin by recalling a moment when you were angry and noticing what is happening in your body.
• Use journaling to explore and notice all the nuanced feelings that accompany your anger.

IDEAS: 

• Here’s the corrected version of your text:
• Anger is one of the core emotions. It is healthy and normal.
• To become more true, authentic, free, and integrated, we need to be in touch with our anger.
• Anger arises naturally as a response to protect ourselves when a boundary—internal or external—is crossed.
• Setting a limit doesn’t have to involve rage.
• A world without anger would feel deflated and collapsed.
• A distorted form of anger can manifest as violence or self-violence.
• Often, sadness or grief is hidden beneath anger.
• Culturally, there is significant judgment around anger and angry people. Many feel guilty, bad, or wrong when they experience anger.
• When anger is not expressed, it can build up and eventually explode.
• Friendships can deepen when anger is allowed to be expressed.
• Anger is a legitimate emotion. Just as we don’t typically question positive emotions by asking, “Why are you feeling that way?” there’s no need to ask “why” when someone feels angry.
• Our early relationships shape how we relate to the world, creating object relationships where people or things represent those early connections. This can result in misdirected anger.
• By addressing the internal relationship and the associated grief, we can liberate ourselves—focusing on the root cause of the pain.
• Our memories are always accessible, as they reside within our bodies.

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Ashley T. Booth is a psychotherapist and pioneering figure in psychedelic-assisted therapy, specializing in modalities such as Internal Family Systems (IFS), somatic psychotherapy, and ketamine-assisted therapy. She is the founder of the Southern California Psychedelic Society and co-founder of InnerSpace Integration. With over 750 ketamine-assisted psychotherapy sessions under her belt, Ashley is a leading advocate for integrating psychedelics into therapeutic practices and is recognized as a top thought leader in the field. She is also the author of Quieting the Storm Within, an introduction to IFS therapy, and actively contributes to psychedelic education and harm reduction efforts.

LINKS: 

ashleybooth.net 

IFSandbeyond.com

PRACTICES: 

• Get comfortable not knowing the answer. Let mysteries stay mysteries longer than feels comfortable.
• Use systems to make sense of the work.
• Explore different frequencies so you can tune in with others.
• Model joy to give others permission to do the same.
• Do this work in community and with wisdom keepers who have gone before.
• Let people go through phases of grasping and longing.
• Use challenges as learning opportunities and ways to grow.

IDEAS: 

• The drug war shaped harmful ideas about medicine and drugs. We can break free from those paradigms.
• Drugs can be used to escape, and sometimes that is necessary.
• Instead of saying "recreational use," say "celebratory use" to emphasize life and connection.
• Try to be in right relationship with these substances.
• Drugs often lead to deep experiences of love.
• We are souls beyond what can be named with words.
• Recognize and honor Indigenous cultures that use plant medicines and carry important knowledge.
• Drugs are not cures. They help us face limiting beliefs and allow us to feel more deeply, both pain and joy.
• These medicines often make you feel worse before you feel better. You have to break things down before rebuilding.
• These medicines are spreading during a critical time in human evolution. Help is coming from many places: plants, animals, fungi, even labs.
• Things once considered shameful deserve to be accepted as they are. Shame can also be a way we try to feel safe and belong.
• Internal Family Systems (IFS) views us as made up of many inner parts, each with its own voice, needs, and memories. These parts often form to protect us and reflect our deeper human needs. When these protective parts are gently acknowledged and allowed to step back, we can access a deeper essence within us known as the Self. Through this process, IFS helps us understand what blocks our vitality and guides us back to our true nature.

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-GUEST BIOGRAPHY-

Becca Rich (she/her) is an engineer turned certified holistic time coach and educator. Her work is to coach and teach people how to approach time management as a whole, human being so that they can make the most of their time. She believes that collaborating with time is essential for self-care, experiencing presence and joy, and living an impactful and fulfilling life.

More about Becca: 

https://www.theholistictimecoach.com/ 

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES: 

• Connect to the present moment in a way that makes sense to you. For instance, guided meditation, visualization, dancing, stretching, shaking, oracle or tarot cards. 
• Meander through a city instead of planning out a trip.
• Connect to the voice that is telling you that there isn’t enough time with curiosity and compassion. What is it telling you ? Why is it here ? What part of you is it ? What is it trying to do for you ? Then hold that part of you, although it may be uncomfortable. It will get easier. 
• Practice sitting or lying while not doing anything. This is not meditation, but rather allowing your body to do whatever it wants with self-acceptance and self-compassion. Allow time to be expansive in this moment. 
• Lean into the addictive behaviour. What is this really about ? What feelings are present ? What are you running from or not wanting to be with ? 
• Try not making to-do lists and simply let things naturally flow. 
• Take a minute, put your hand on your chest and breathe for a minute. 

IDEAS: 

• Time impacts our physical, emotional and spiritual lives. 
• We are inherently worthy without doing anything, yet we often develop an addiction to doing. 
• Sometimes this addiction can take on other forms: to self-harm, to self-hate, to not being still, to being on, to working, to productivity, to an inability to be with self. 
• An addiction is something you are repeatedly doing that you don’t want to be doing. 
• Often, an internal critic is trying to protect us in some way, for instance from failure, or from a message that you are receiving from the world. 
• We’ve been taught to sell our time and turn our life into a resource. 
• We are taught that time hacks will make us more productive but deeper work is required to have a healthy relationship to time. 
• We can move from a sense of time scarcity to time abundance. 
• When we heal our relationship to time, we free up our energy to do the things that are the most important to us.
• People with a healthy relationship to time don’t say scarcity scripts or phrases, and are present and intentional. They collaborate with time in an expansive relationship and don’t try to control it. 

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Dan Rudolph is an educator, facilitator, systems thinker, and seeker of truth. For 2.5 years, Dan lived in a monastic setting, professionally practicing mindfulness. During his spare time at the monastery, he studied clowning and offered play-based workshops in the community. In this period the connections between 'play', meditation and culture-change became increasingly clear.

The positive feedback and impact that people shared from the workshops inspired Dan to keep going and nurture the seeds of what is now called Unified Playfulness, which is a unique play-based approach geared towards the cultivation of mindful awareness and behavior change. 

Dan offers customizable and general Unified Playfulness workshops for individuals, teams, and public groups, both online and in-person. He is currently based in Tio:tia’ke/Montreal, on the shores of the Iroquois River. You can contact him at danrudolph108@gmail.com.

Website: https://stitch-bottle-42c.notion.site/Unified-Playfulness-8cc8859d87724fbdb3bed91b20310a19

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES: 

• Chant with the different parts of the ohm sound (a-o-mm). 
• Inspiration from Butoh clown: moving slowly and laughing. 
• Role-play situations in life where you could integrate mindfulness. 
• Speak in a different voice. 
• Try doing not practical things. 
• Start gatherings with a grounding practice like meditation, touch, massage, dancing or shaking. 
• Try to communicate with other people without words. 
• You can integrate mindfulness and play into your day in many different ways. 
• Sing with your toothbrush. 
• Laugh while doing dishes. 
• Making a cover fort & tell a story. 
• Take 10 minutes each day to play - no regular words or technology, everything else is ok 
• Give yourself a little quest when you go outside
• Starting a creative hobby like learning how to juggle. 
• Make yourself as ugly as possible with makeup. 
• Talk to the plants like they were alive - ‘Hey, how are you doing today?’
• Send a message to yourself a week later and send it by e-mail. 
• Cook and do something different.
• Intuitive writing involves simply writing without thinking and permitting yourself to be open. 

IDEAS: 

• Taking things not so seriously can improve our ability to handle serious and complex topics. 
• We can shift unhealthy patterns that have developed by changing our behaviour. 
• Balance is needed between the rational and the intuitive, the competitive and the cooperative. 
• Play and mindfulness share many characteristics. They are both regenerative practices. 
• Develop a state of mind where play and mindfulness are integrated into everything you do. 
• Our shadow parts can be our deepest learnings. 
• You can ensure people will be safe all of the time because people have different needs. 

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-GUEST BIOGRAPHY-

Métis / mixed-settler multidisciplinary artist, educator, Somatic Experiencing Practitioner (SEP™) and vocalist, Moe Clark (she/they) is a 2Spirit singing thunderbird. Moe was born and raised in Treaty 7 (Calgary) and is a proud member of the Métis Nation of Alberta who currently resides in Tio'tiá:ke/ Mooniyang/ Montréal (QC). A dedicated nêhiyawêwin (Plains Cree language) and Michif (Métis language) learner, Moe collaborates intimately with Indigenous Elders and knowledge keepers to advance language resurgence through song-based practices. She works across disciplines of vocal improvisation, land-based oskapêwis facilitation (ceremonial Elder apprenticeship), drum circle healing work, and performance creation, to co-create contexts that centre collective liberation, embodied knowledge, 2Spirit Indigenous resurgence, and healing through creative kinship.  

Moe’s last solo album “Within” toured across North America and their collaborative video poem “nitahkôtân” won best Indigenous language music video at the ImagiNative film festival. Moe’s poem “committing a dream / pawâkan Palestine” won the 2024 Ian Ferrier Spoken Word Prize through the Quebec Writers’ Federation. Moe has performed the world over, including the Lincoln Centre (US), Sydney Opera House (AU) and Origins Festival in London (UK).

PRACTICES:

• Open a space with warmth and intention so participants feel welcomed, grounded, and aware that something meaningful is beginning.
• Acknowledge the land, territory, and peoples connected to the place to situate the gathering within a larger web of history and relationship.
• Call in helpers such as ancestors, spirits, community members, or guiding energies to support the intention of the ceremony.
• Turn ordinary actions into rituals by bringing attention and intention to them.
• Stand facing the wind and ask it to clear your mind or move stagnant thoughts and energy.
• Relate consciously to the elements such as earth, water, wind, and fire as living forces that support life and transformation.
• Adapt rituals to modern circumstances so their spirit continues even when traditional conditions are not available.
• Use music as a ceremonial tool by listening deeply, singing together, or letting rhythm guide reflection.
• Let community witness moments of change, growth, or vulnerability so transformation is supported rather than isolated.
• Spend time with natural places such as rivers, trees, or open landscapes and observe what they teach.
• Hold natural elements like water, stones, or ice with attention to deepen awareness of change and interconnection.
• Incorporate moments of celebration into everyday life rather than saving them only for special occasions.
• Encourage people to ask for support and reach toward community when they need help.
• Practise collective care by creating spaces where people can support one another emotionally and spiritually.

IDEAS: 

• Ritual practices help people remember that they are part of a larger web of life and creation.
• Belonging is not a fixed state but an ongoing process of seeking and strengthening relationships.
• Healing often happens through remembering connections that have been forgotten or neglected.
• Kinship can extend beyond humans to include animals, landscapes, plants, and everyday encounters.
• Ceremony does not require perfection; mistakes, humour, and discomfort can all be part of the sacred process.
• Hyper-individualistic culture can weaken the sense of belonging that rituals normally strengthen.
• Reciprocity and relationship matter more than appearance or performance.

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Khan Ramkeesoon, a former licensed mental health therapist, now works as a group facilitator and coach specializing in embodied transformation and playfulness. An immigrant from Trinidad & Tobago of South Asian descent, Khan brings a rich cultural heritage and personal experience to their practice. As a queer and non-binary individual, Khan helps clients connect with their inner wisdom and experience greater love and joy amidst complex emotions.

PRACTICES: 

• When experiencing anxiety, get curious and tune into the sensations in the body. Explore what memories, concerns, desires and needs are there. Then, inquire into what else is present and what more you need to know. Finally, offer support and presence to the part of you that is feeling the anxiety. 
• Ask how yourself how you are feeling about the anxiety.
• Adjust your breath to calm down. For instance, you can add an extended exhale. 
• To improve your capacity to navigate anxiety, you can think of something challenging. Then relax your body and extend your exhale.  
• Do a death practice where you lie down and imagine your death. Alternatively, do a year-long practice where you imagine you are going to die. 

IDEAS: 

• Anxiety is an alert that something is going on. It is not bad. 
• From that initial alert, we can attach additional layers of interpretation. 
• It makes sense that we feel anxiety in social situations because our connections are meaningful for our survival. 
• Instead of considering whether your level of anxiety is normal, consider whether it is affecting the way that you would like to be functioning in the world. 
• Someone who has lots of anxiety is just picking up on a lot of things. There doesn’t need to be judgement about it; this ability can also be considered a gift. 
• You don’t need to intellectualize or rationalize with the part of you that is anxious.
• Running away will also not help. 
• As compared to stress, anxiety often has an element of feeling danger. 
• Imagine a world where people are excited about death in the context of union & connection. 
• By being in stillness and in coherence you can help anxious people who are around you.

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